HEATHER, GET BACK TO WHERE YOU ONCE BELONGED

These are the unpleasant facts.

Heather Mills and Paul McCartney announced their separation in 2006, leading to an acrimonious divorce battle, the run-up to which was played out in public, most notably in the British tabloids.
In March 2008, Mills was awarded £24.3 million ($48.7 million), plus payments of £35,000 ($70,000) per annum, and nanny and school costs for their daughter, Beatrice. In his judgment, Mr Justice Bennett described Mills as a "kindly person" who is devoted to her charitable causes, with a strong-willed and determined personality, who has shown great fortitude in overcoming her disability, and who argued her case with a "steely, yet courteous, determination." He added that he regretted to say her testimony appeared "inconsistent and inaccurate", and "less than candid." Feelings reportedly ran high during the hearing, to the point where Mills poured a jug of water over the head of McCartney's solicitor, Fiona Shackleton।

Apparently Heather wound up with less than she was offered before she became her own attorney, a measely 48 million. She then declared victory, must be a McCain fan. Yes Paul can afford it. But how did she earn THAT much? If his first wife Linda got something like that I could see it. Linda, who was the love of his life, was a part of his band, Wings.

This is just a poor excuse for me to drift back to when I saw the Beatles in person. It was August 1964 and it was to be the Beatles first appearance in New York. No not Shea Stadium. And by the way, Boomers and others, Elvis Presley's first television network appearance was NOT The Ed Sullivan Show. The answer is down below. *

My father was riding high as part owner of an advertising agency located on the second floor of the Look Building at 488 Madison Avenue in New York City। Look was a long ago magazine that rivaled Life Magazine. It was the summer after my graduation from high school and I was the office boy. Our receptionist was Playboy Bunny material so this 18 year old had a tendency to hang aroung the front desk. I overheard her on the phone with a ticket broker. She was saying "really? No kidding." I said "What? What?" She put her hand over the mouthpiece and said that a company had just pulled out of purchasing the last 40 tickets to the first Beatles concert in New York City. I said "Hold the phone." Thus began my first business deal.

I went into my father's wall to wall white office and said I needed to borrow $280. right away. Yes, the Beatle tickets were $7. each. He said "Are you sure? " I told him this Beatle thing is big and I could make some money. That afternoon the tickets were mine.

Several of my friends of course wanted to go। But I had 40 tickets. I went all around Long Island telling people I had those last tickets to the Beatles. They didn't believe the tickets were real. In the end the tickets were sold to friends and friends of friends at $8 a piece.
So the big night arrived. We all drove into Queens to the Forest Hills Tennis Stadium where summer concerts happen every year. It is horsehoe shaped, seating 14,000, a stage opposite the horsehoe, grass down below. It was summer so plenty bright at 7 pm. The most excited in our group was Tim McGrath. He was a little twisted, later to survive Viet Nam, somewhat more twisted. He had a tendancy to unexpectedly break into singing the song "Sukiyaki" by Japanese crooner Kyu Sakamoto, which was a big hit here in 1963।

We waited the next hour as the seats filled up with an alarming amout of 13 year old girls। We waited some more as the sun started to sink. Everyone started to clap impatiently. Then the sound of a helicopter was heard approaching. It was a big blue one. Out beyond the stage was still more grass and that's where the helicopter landed. You could see them running toward the back of the stage: Ringo, John, Paul and George. Those 13 year old girls began to scream. They would never stop.

They took the stage। Down on the grass separating the seats and the stage there were wire fence baricades every 20 feet. Police were near the fences and the stage. While the girls screamed they constantly took flashbulb pictures. They went into their second song. We still couldn't hear them. Song three. Song Four. Tim Mcgrath was now holding his head bent down beneath his knees softly singing a very depressed version of "Sukiyaki".

Song Five, screaming and flashbulbs still going, three girls decided to go for it. They were climbing over the barriers down on the grass. Cops were trying to head them off. But one tall girl was beating the odds. Just missing a cop at the last barrier she got up onto the stage and wrapped herself around George Harrison's leg. Another girl almost made it but was tackled by a cop right on stage. More were coming. That was the end - 5 songs, 26 minutes. We didn't hear a note.

We could see them run back onto the helicopter. Shocked isn't quite the word to capture how we felt. I had planned that we go to manhattan that night to a comedy club called "Jackie Cannon's Rat Fink Room". ( 90 per cent of all comedians in the 50's 60's and 70's had the first name Jackie) It was fun but not enough to ease our pain.

We certainly detested those 13 year old girls।

Beware, they are 57 now and still out there. And so is Heather.

*Elvis Presley's first network television appearance was on January 28th 1956 on "Stage Show" starring Tommy and Jimmy Dorsey, a summer replacement for Jackie Gleason. Presley didn't appear on Ed Sullivan until Sept. 9th, 1956

"Spin City" is Still Spinning

GARY DAVID GOLDBERG

The other day I was in Borders Books and sat down with a new autobiography " Sit, Ubu, Sit : How I Went from Brooklyn to Hollywood with the Same Woman, the Same Dog, and a Lot Less Hair" by Gary David Goldberg. After writing and producing shows at MTM Goldberg formed UBU Productions, famous for their closing of "Sit, Ubu, sit - good dog." Ubu Roi was Goldberg's dog in college. Under this banner, nine television series have been created, including the enormously successful Family Ties, which ran on NBC 1982-1989, and the critically acclaimed Brooklyn Bridge which aired on CBS 1991-1993. In association with DreamWorks, UBU produced Spin City which ran for six seasons on ABC. Just for the syndication of Family Ties, Mr. Goldberg walked away with over $200 million dollars.

In the book he acurately describes how a professional writer, Nate Monaster, had come down from Hollywood to San Diego State for one school year 1973-74, to find, and help, young writers. Mr Monaster had a long career in the business, having been nominated for an oscar for "That Touch of Mink" with Doris Day and Cary Grant. He had also served as president of the Writer's Guild of America. Monaster had recommended Goldberg to an agent and the rest was hollywood history.

What's amazing to me it that this is supposed to be an autobiography centered around his hollywood career yet no mention is made of his pivotal role in the most current ugliness in the history of the industry - Ageism. I'm referring to a class action lawsuit brought into the courts in 2000 and STILL winding it's way towards judgment day. The most quoted statement in this lawsuit comes out of the mouth of Gary David Goldberg. Below are some excerpts from an article in an AARP publication "Hollywood to Writer's - Your Fired!"

Once a successful television writer, Tracy Keenan Wynn now lives in a 400-square-foot efficiency apartment in Colorado, drives a battered Jeep with 225,000 miles on it and keeps his Emmy awards packed away in a box because "it hurts to look at them."
Not a day goes by that Wynn, the son of actor Keenan Wynn and grandson of comedian Ed Wynn, doesn’t jot down an idea for a TV series, work on a plot outline or tweak a script. But the man whose writing credits include The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman and The Longest Yard says after he turned 45, Hollywood—in its relentless quest for young writers to attract young audiences—turned its back on him.
"I have energy, ability and experience—but no work," Wynn says ruefully.

Now, Wynn and more than 150 other television writers over age 40 are in court with AARP as their co-counsel in a far-reaching series of 23 class action lawsuits that charge Hollywood’s television industry—networks, studios, talent agencies and production companies—with age discrimination. The defendants are a Who’s Who of TV powerhouses, from the William Morris Agency, NBC and the Walt Disney Co. to Fox Entertainment, Universal and Paramount.

"Age discrimination is so established in this industry, everyone is offended we are questioning it," says Paul Sprenger, of the Washington office of law firm Sprenger & Lang, the lead attorney for the plaintiffs.
Sprenger, who has successfully tried several of the largest age discrimination cases in the country, says, "This is by far and away the best case on the merits that I’ve had.
"No one in Hollywood would say publicly, ‘I don’t hire women,’ or ‘I don’t hire blacks,’ " he adds, "but they will say, ‘I don’t hire older workers.’ "

And in fact, the court papers quote dozens of public statements on age from a number of high-profile TV executives, like Marta Kauffman, co-creator of the hit television series Friends, who told an interviewer: "Once you hit 40, you can’t do it anymore. Who’s got this energy to go on three hours of sleep? You just can’t do it. And also, I think the networks and studios, they want new, fresh ideas. They’re looking for young people coming in out of college."

********************

Gary David Goldberg, creator of the comedy series Spin City, told TV Guide his program had "no writers on the set over the age of 29—by design." The court papers say that Brandon Tartikoff, when he was president of NBC, declared a policy of not hiring older writers, while former Fox Broadcasting president Jamie Kellner said, "We don’t need anyone over 50 years of age to succeed with our business plan."

*********************

But younger writers aren’t necessarily the best writers, TV veterans say.
"I never watched Friends," says Larry Gelbart, 76, who created the wildly successful TV series M*A*S*H, "maybe because it was written by people straight out of college."
Gelbart is not part of the lawsuits, but the comedy writer, whose credits include Tootsie and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, says, "The only way to avoid age discrimination in Hollywood is to die young."

Goldberg's daughter was a writer/producer for the much beloved ??? "Friends".

By the way when my first screenplay was seriously considered at 20th Century Fox, the man in charge Alan Ladd, Jr. ( who bought "Star Wars" from George Lucas) couldn't understand how a 31 year old could have written the story of a man going through a midlife crisis. It is my belief that young can write for old, and visa versa. Now 30 years later I'm fiinishing a script about a ghost. If it gets to a young executive's desk I better certify that I'm dead so I have the right perspective.

Now Mr Goldberg, in this so called autobiography says he's retired in Vermont, spurns things of our "culture" i.e. he watches no series television "none" he proudly states and doesn't have a computer. This shows him to be the true boomer cliche', one of the earliest to have three names, the mandatory stint in Berkeley, no wedding ceremony for him, he was of a new generation to make the world better. They say if this law suit ever gets resolved it will show as many as 6000 writers who were adversely affected, down to dwindling or non existant careers.

Back to 1974 San Diego State. In the book Goldberg correctly points to Nate Monaster as the one person responsible for his career. Nate Monaster passed away in 1990 long before this controversy reared its head. I happened to be in Nate Monaster's class back in San Diego. Nate Monaster tried to help me too. My story is to be in another book which will carry the title of this blog. But to paraphrase Lloyd Bensten in that long ago debate against Dan Quayle. I knew Nate Monaster. I was quite friendly with Nate Monaster. In fact I discussed the Hollywood blacklist Communist witch hunts of the 1950's with Nate in his Los Angeles living room. He felt strongly about the damage done to many during that period. He said it went on for generations. He had people come up to him shamefully and apologize that their father had named names. Besides suicides and crushed careers like Larry Parks "The Jolson Story" people like Lee Grant and Zero Mostel couldn't work for over a decade. Anyway Mr. Goldberg you're no Nate Monaster. An honest autobiography would have at least had addressed the controversy.

So as you walk your 5 dogs and no doubt eat your politcally correct "Ben and Jerry's" Ice Cream in Vermont, Mr Goldberg , I'm sure you give no thought to your real Hollywood legacy. I would expect you to pull a Martha Stewart about any criticism "You are all jealous." I checked on the Wikipedia version of Gary David Goldberg. Since it looked like a press release I added a few lines of simple facts about his role in the lawsuit. Sure enough the next morning those lines had been removed. "Spin City" still spins.